The Big Cross-Country Move, Part II
February 8th, 2012 | Rachel
Greetings from Roswell, New Mexico!
For those of you just joining me, here’s the deal. I was practicing law in New York City. Now I am moving across the country to California to open a bakery.
Two and a half weeks ago I loaded up my dad’s minivan and, with my friend Davina, drove out of the city. Our first stop was State College, Pennsylvania to see Travis, a close friend since high school. After that, Davina and I headed south to Asheville, North Carolina to see Davina’s grandfather and other extended family. The next day, we drove through Atlanta, stopping to see one of Davina’s friends before ended up in Auburn, Alabama where my mom, brother and grandmother all live.
I drove Davina to the Atlanta airport the next day, and then hung out in Alabama for a week. I caught up on some sleep, inventoried my growing collection of vintage cookbooks, answered a lot of my grandmother’s technology-related questions, and caught up with my mom and brother. For the first time in a month I could think about something besides packing and moving logistics.
Steve joined me about a week ago. His ship is drilling off the coast of West Africa, and he had to be away for a little longer than usual. Then he had to move some of his stuff from New York to Maryland before flying down to Atlanta to join me on the cross-country drive. He spent a few days meeting and catching up with my family in Alabama, and then we set off for the next leg of the trip.
Our first stop was a pit-stop in New Orleans! We were there less than 24 hours, but we had a great night out, stayed in the heart of the city (thank you, Priceline!) and had delicious beignets the next morning.
Steve on our hotel balcony in New Orleans
Breakfast at Cafe Du Monde in New Orleans
After New Orleans, we continued the drive to Houston where Steve’s brother and dad live. Steve’s sister was also visiting over the weekend, so Steve got to catch up on some family time of his own. We went to a Rockets game (thanks to some shmancy box seats!), saw some dueling pianos, went bowling, and had a Superbowl party. We also had a birthday party for Steve’s adorable twin nephews and took a trip over to Galveston to see Steve’s brother’s girlfriend’s salon and eat crawfish. It was a great weekend, and Steve and I both really enjoyed spending so much time with his family.
Houston Skyline
Hurricane Memorial in Galveston
That leads us to today. Steve and I got up early this morning, repacked the van, and hit the road. Although Google told us the drive to Roswell, New Mexico was going to be 12 hours via the interstate, we followed the state road route recommended by the car GPS system and made it in 10 hours. We got to Roswell with just enough time to have a relaxing dinner and catch up on some mindless television. This morning, we are going to go look at some tacky alien stuff before getting back on the road.
29: My best year yet?
February 8th, 2012 | Rachel
Another January 31st has come and gone, meaning I am another year older. Since I am mid-move and spent last week in Alabama, I ended up spending the big day with my family. I can’t remember the last time I got to do that… must have been before college.
One of the highlights of the day was driving to Atlanta to pick up Steve from the airport!
Lunch at Cracker Barrel with Steve on the way home from the airport
I hadn’t seen him in six weeks, so this was particularly exciting :-)
The other highlight of the day was a dinner at Country’s Barbecue with my mom, brother, grandmother, cousin, and Steve. Delicious!
Due to my recent career and location changes, it is already clear that this next year is going to be special. I am really curious to see what I can accomplish before I hit the big 3-0.
The Problematic 3%
January 30th, 2012 | Rachel
Ok, real talk.
I’m a pretty easy going person. I stay cool under pressure (too cool, I’ve heard), and I’m never in a rush. I’m open-minded and reasonably patient. I also like (or am neutral about) almost everyone. In fact, if I had to quantify it, I’d say I like about 97% of the people I meet.
I credit Match-dating for greatly enhancing my interpersonal skills. I remember moving to New York City after graduating from law school and being really frustrated with my inability to talk to other people. As my college boyfriend could attest, I was very guarded throughout my early-adulthood. I think I sat mute through the first two or three dates before I finally opened my mouth. I could speak freely only with people who had known me long enough to earn a key into my inner sanctum.
Anyway, something about being thrown into one-on-one social situations with complete strangers and having to engage them for an hour or two while simultaneously revealing enough of myself to determine any substantive compatibility revolutionized my social abilities. No joke. Suddenly, I was meeting people everywhere I went.
It wasn’t just limited to dates. My entire social network grew exponentially as I made myself more open to other people. If you’ve ever been to one of my parties, then you’ve seen how my “group” of friends is more like a spiderweb that branches out in a lot of different directions and is constantly growing.
So… yeah. People. I like almost all of them. At the Three Green Ducks, I would often come to the defense of particularly ornery customers that everyone else hated but that I found interesting.
The problem is with the people I don’t like. For 97% of the population, I can sincerely respect them as fellow human beings and find something to appreciate. For the remaining 3%, however, it is like a switch goes off in either my head or my heart and I absolutely can’t stand them. I don’t want to talk to them. I don’t want to help them. I don’t even want to look at them. My gut reaction is to shut them down and get them out of my life as fast as possible.
This is not a good thing if I am going to be a part of the customer service industry.
After working at the Three Green Ducks for about five months and having a handful of negative interactions with customers who were truly horrible people but, alas, were still customers, I had a flash of personal enlightenment.
I realized I needed to turn my ego down a few notches and get over myself. Part of the reason I quickly jump to detesting someone is my ego feels threatened and my personal defense mechanism springs into action. Unfortunately, those defense shields don’t leave room for compromise or any higher cause, such as making a sale or the business’s reputation for customer service.
I resolved to not take it personally the next time someone came in with a bad attitude that historically would have rubbed me the wrong way. I noticed one of my co-oworkers was a particularly good example of how to handle problematic customers. The ruder they were, the sweeter she would be.
This turned out to be a good conscious exercise. Instead of unintentionally growing angry to the point I snapped, I intentionally turned on my biggest smile and sweetest voice. The customer’s bad attitude became fuel for my own patience and positivity. And it was a challenge, which is always fun.
Toward the end of my time with the Three Green Ducks, I mentally started pretending like the bakery was my own bakery and it was my personal and professional reputation on the line. This made it a lot easier to remember and exercise principles of good customer service.
When it all boils down, the entire dessert-baking industry exists to bring people happiness and pleasure. People purchase baked desserts to celebrate special occasions, to express love or other positive feelings, or to simply enjoy the moment. There’s really no point in introducing any negativity into the transaction, and if a customer comes in with a bad attitude, then it is my job as a vendor and customer service agent to make sure they have a positive experience (if it is possible).
Even outside of the business, I hope to be more open and patient with that 3% of people. Seeing as how I am starting from scratch in building my California network, I will have plenty of opportunities to practice.
The Big Cross-Country Move, Part I
January 24th, 2012 | Rachel
Well, I’m officially a homeless vagrant.
I (with my dad‘s help) emptied my storage unit into a U-Box that is now on its way to the U-Haul center in Santa Cruz.
Loaded U-Box under the watchful gaze of the Empire State Building
I said goodbye to my friends in New York City over the course of several farewell gatherings, the first of which was an amazing surprise party organize by my two best friends Carey and Davina. This is the part that made me sad about leaving. I was blessed with a lot of amazing friends in the city.
Preview of California Rachel ? (from my surprise going-away party… a huge thanks to Zeke for taking photos!)
The time finally came to pack up the last of my belongings that I’ve been living with the past eight months at Steve’s apartment. As the pile got taller and taller, I got more and more anxious that it was not going to fit in the minivan I would be driving first to Alabama and then to California. It took me until 3am to get it all together, and I had exactly three hours to nap before we had to pack the car and leave.
Loading the minivan
As I had feared, there was just too much to take with me. I could leave a few things at the apartment for Steve to deal with, but I was trying to keep that to a minimum. My dad suggested taking out the passenger seats (the rear bench was already back at his house in West Virginia), and without them I managed to fit everything except two boxes, a rug and a large painting.
My dad had to leave at 8am to catch his series of flights back to Afghanistan, and Davina and I finally finished loading everything (including the bicycles on my snazzy new bike rack — thanks dad!) at 10am. It was an hour behind schedule, but I felt 1,000 pounds lighter driving out of the city (well, riding… Davina didn’t trust me driving on three hours of sleep). I kept waiting to feel sad about it, but the overwhelming emotion was excitement.
The first stop was State College, Pennsylvania to see my old friend Travis who is finishing up a phD in higher education at Penn State. Apparently it had snowed the night before, and everything was covered in a beautiful blanket of snow!
Travis in the snow
We stayed in State College a little longer than planned, so by the time we were rolling out of town it was almost 6pm. The plan was to drive south to Asheville, but that was a 9-hour drive, and neither of us had slept enough to be driving until 3am. Still, there was a winter storm coming our way, and weather reports as far south as Virginia had warnings in effect until the following afternoon. We (and by we, I mean Davina because she still didn’t trust my driving) decided to push ahead and get as far south as possible before finding a hotel.
The last couple of hours in Virginia were a little precarious as the snow set in with high winds gusting around us and the surrounding semi trucks. I was so exhausted I couldn’t keep my eyes open, but then I’d wake up startled by the trucks and snow and convinced we were going to die. Davina, fortunately, stayed cool and got us to Lexington, Virginia where it wasn’t going to drop below freezing and thus we didn’t have to worry about the roads the following morning. Our hotel, which I got through Priceline, was a lot nicer than we expected, and we both slept great that night.
The next day was gray but benign, and we finished the drive to Asheville without any problems.
Storefront of the building in downtown Asheville, NC owned by Davina’s grandfather
While in Asheville, Davina and I stayed with her aunt and grandfather, got a tour of the downtown area (where Davina’s grandfather owns a building), visited her grandmother who is recovering from a back injury, and had dinner with several other members of her extended family. If felt so good being around so many friendly southern accents.
The next morning we went to breakfast with Davina’s grandfather at the Moose Cafe, a restaurant my own family frequented back when my dad lived in Asheville. The next leg was Atlanta, Georgia, where Davina had a chance to catch up with a friend from a study abroad program in Nice, France. Her friend, Amy, was also a UGA graduate, and we actually know a few people in common.
The last leg was a short two-hour drive to Auburn, Alabama where my mom, brother and grandmother live. This was Davina’s first time in this great state, so we gave her a proper introduction by taking her to Country’s Barbecue, a staple in my family since I was a kid.
Giant rocking chair at Country’s Barbecue
And now, I am hanging out at my grandmother’s house for the next week and a half. I took Davina to the Atlanta airport where she jetted off to California to snowboard for a week before returning to New York City. I am catching up on my sleep and starting to think about all of the stuff I stopped thinking about when my brain became completely preoccupied with moving.
It is weird to not be in the city right now, but it still feels like I’m just away for a visit. Maybe it won’t hit me until Steve and I are settling into our new home in California. Or maybe it won’t be until I see my friends continuing on with their New York City lives without me. Regardless, it feels right for the time being, so I guess I’ll enjoy that before the inevitable crisis of faith occurs and I feel sad about missing out on some fabulous event in NYC.
Oh what a difference a dad makes
January 18th, 2012 | Rachel
My dad is in town as a part of his three-week R&R trip home from Afghanistan. He was already planning on coming here before I announced my moving date, but the timing of it all couldn’t have been more perfect in the end.
I had been getting a little… overwhelmed by the final week of moving. It was partially due to my ever-growing to-do list, but a lot of it was just the mental and emotional effects of packing up the life that I have really loved in New York and preparing to leave my friends, some of whom are now in my innermost circle of “best” friends.
My dad drove in yesterday, parking my new (old) minivan in Jersey City and then taking the PATH. We had some drinks together in the middle of the afternoon, took a break to watch some episodes of Breaking Bad (I am introducing him to the show), and had Korean barbecue for dinner with Arthur. This morning we went out and got some boxes, had brunch at Community, and then fetched the minivan.
We made it through the Holland Tunnel without any problems, but then we were in Manhattan for exactly ten minutes before I missed the turn (he was driving, but I was the copilot) and ended up in Brooklyn. If I am going to get stuck driving in circles with anyone, it might as well be my dad. He stayed in good spirits throughout the driving adventure, even through the three hours it took us to retrieve a few pieces of furniture from Arthur’s loft.
We are now taking a little break at home (watching Breaking Bad) before heading out to dinner at my favorite restaurant, Punch, followed by my last little goodbye gathering at Arctica.
I’ve been hanging out with my dad for about 24 hours now, and I can already breathe better and walk lighter. Part of it is knowing I have someone to help me load up the U-Box tomorrow, but mostly it is just because he’s my dad and he’s here.
Thanks, dad.
